|Photo by RobW_ off Flickr|
Maybe I’m a prude, but nudist beaches aren’t really my thing. I’m not sure if it’s because I still haven’t been able to recover from a very traumatic holiday experience when I was a child. It happened 30 years ago in what was then still called Yugoslavia. I was 10 years old and my parents came up with the brilliant idea to take me and my younger brother to a nudist camp site in Istria.
Upon arrival we made a reconnaissance drive around the site first to see if we liked it enough to pitch our tent. I can vividly recall the horrid things I saw that afternoon from the backseat of our chocolate coloured Peugeot 505. I remember a couple of people playing tennis wearing nothing but trainers and sweat bands, penises and breasts perkily bouncing up and down while their owners were trying to reach for some high balls. I saw two naked girls my age playing with equally naked Barbies. Next to their tent a family was sitting around their BBQ grilling sausages and hot dogs. Naked. It was too much flesh on display for me and my little brother and the two of us were screaming at the top of our longs, and yelling that we didn’t want to stay at that horrible camp site. So the only thing left for my mom and dad to do, was take us to the camp site next door where clothing was much to our relief, required.
My parents go to nudist beaches all the time, now that my brother and I have flown their nest. Curious about the reason why they like walking around in the buff in front of complete strangers so much, I asked them the question. My dad’s answer was that he doesn’t care about the other people and that he just doesn’t like wearing wet swimsuits. Apparently it makes his bum itchy. My mom agreed with this and added that it saves her a couple of quid for not having to buy swimsuits.
However, not all nudists and naturists will have the same reasons for dropping trou on the beach. I saw a survey in a magazine recently and apparently there is a large number of people who like to bear all because they like the idea of other people looking at them. The only thing is that the most people don’t exactly look like Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, but more like Shrek and Princess Fiona after she’s Shrekified. I’m a firm believer that man invented the swimsuit for a reason and that’s because most people just look better wearing it.
Regardless of that traumatic experience in Yugoslavia, I have accompanied my parents to nudist beaches once or twice. Albeit reluctantly and in bikini. Top and bottom. Because I believe everyone needs to leave something to the imagination, whatever shape or size.